Let's See. New Kidney? Or A Yacht?

There is a sport that I suppose is played around the world that baffles me, no end. Just because I don't like to watch or play it doesn't mean it's a lousy game. Don't get me wrong. I don't have a grudge against anyone nor do I envy the champions of this sport.

I have a good friend who seems to enjoy getting up at four in the morning to arrive on the greens by six. Not a terrible scenario...unless you consider that his foursome finishes the round four and a half hours later. I see a lot more redemption in showing up at the tennis courts by seven and hitting the showers by nine - a program that rocks for me in July.

The problem I have with the game of golf is that it is the only spectator sport I know of where you can spend the equivalent of half a day watching the participants walk from one spot to another without actually playing! That's just for openers.

If you haven't guessed, I don't play golf. I don't have time for golf, which brings me to the other end of the axe I have to grind.

Shortly after I got into business, many years ago, a customer said to me, "Bill, if only you played golf, you and I could do a lot more business together!"

My reflexes prompted me to think: why don't we just have lunch for two hours? That would save us time and money, and it would give me more than enough time to sell my deal. I could not see his logic; and I see less of it now than when I was thirty years younger. Please allow me to elaborate.

The skill that's required to sink a white sphere that weighs less than two ounces into a cup measuring roughly twice the dimension is not what I call super human. Additionally, I contend that a golfer can prove his or her ability to drive, chip and putt a perfectly shaped object in as few as nine holes on any course. I don't get many arguments on that score.

So, let's look at the money. Oh, that. Yes, that. According to a CBS correspondent, Tiger Woods is knocking on the door of $1 billion in earnings [probably includes royalties] and I believe that mark will be achieved in less than 10 years as a professional. Folks, there is another way of presenting that kind of information, but the language would not be permitted in this forum.

The money that top players earn, not just in the golfing world, but specifically to drive a pitted little orb into the air is past egregious, in my view.

Merchandising to the tune of one thousand times one million dollars for a few obligatory ten-second poses after the ball is hit goes against the grain, to use a figure of speech. At the risk of sounding like a bleeding heart – for which I would not qualify – doctors, scientists, artists and educators would have to combine their lifetime salaries in lots, starting at just around 1,000 heads per, to match the spoils thrust upon one man who has only lived three decades, so far.

There are people in the world whose delight in receiving a kidney transplant would outshine Woods' pleasure in having his furniture shipped to domiciles positioned near his tournaments. Other starving souls would be grateful to get a serving of real food on a plastic plate. I'm referring to the unsung poverty stricken Americans, some of them living within a stone's throw of our wealthiest country clubs.

If recognition of a gifted sportsman costs $1 billion every ten years, the scale of equity in the world definitely needs recalibrating. Do you think Rolex has a clue, or even wants one?